I was in the 7 11 buying me another Colt 45 with my food stamps (the Indian clerk on 2nd shift accepts food stamps for everything!) when I passed by the home pregnancy tests. I hadn't been able to keep down my Lobster tails for the past couple checks now, so that set off warning bells. Sure enough, I shoved that test down my pants, pissed on the stick at the Citgo on 49th, and Yep it was positive. You do understand what this means don't you? $10.02 more a month! I think I shall name this one Mealticket. Ain't he/she/it adorable?! Just like Daddy, pulling on that J. Not sure if I'll mention that to my new boyfriend, he somehow got the notion this baby's his, LMFAO! If I play my cards right I'll be able to collect child support from 2 idiots. Mental Note: Ask for last names.
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